Friendships

I am very lucky to have great friends in my life. Some I see more than others, some I talk and email to and some that I rarely see but know they are my friends. On days that I am feeling happy or sad I can count on one of my friends to take whatever is going on and flow with it.
I am also very lucky to have my daughters as my friends.......the sweetest thing in life is to have adult children and know they are not only your children but your friends as well.
Armando went to Mexico last night for 10 days to visit his family.....friends call to make sure I am ok....to offer to do things or just to chat. Great feeling. I love the fact that I can have 10 days of no husband to cook or do wifey things for. Just the ability to do whatever I want.
My washer and dryer blew up on the day Armando left......no problem......I can buy an appliance on my own. He said called a repairman.....they are unfixable......so when he returns....I will have a new set. Credit can be powerful thing, LOL. I loved this picture I took in Los Angeles.......
For non speaking friends......the top does not say what the bottom says....but it is very funny.

Family

Family has become so much more important since I have been diagnosed with cancer. Phone calls, letters, emails,and visits are so much more important than they ever were. Family that lives across the country seems so much closer now than before. When I was little it seemed our family was tighter and closer. Now as adults with our own families we drift in out like the waves on the beach. Today my brother called and said he is moving from Oregon to retire in Puerto Rico. The saddness that filled me so quickly was surprising and unexpected. It is not as we see each other on a regular basis...but knowing he was just an 8 hour car ride away was reassuring and comforting. He raised me.....stepped in when my father passed away. Now he is leaving half way around the world to live near my sisters that I know but don't know. I want to beg him to stay but understand the need to go. The family ties are so much looser now..........not as binding as they were. Maybe it is the illness that makes me feel a deeper saddness......don't know.....just wish my family were closer and no one was drifting away.

Good news, keeping fingers crossed

Last week on Wednesday I had a doctor's appt and a chemo infusion. I was happy to have the appt but dreaded the infusion was not something I was looking forward to. The sickness that follows is very hard on me. My appt with my doctor started out with a smile. My CT scan shows shrinkage of tumors, clearing up my lungs and other areas. I didn't expect to hear the news....Elation, surprise and happiness is all I could think of. Going through all the side effects and hair loss has made a difference! I also got news that my proposal for a cancer art theraphy program has been accepted by my HMO. I will get to present to other cancer patients and help them distract from the worries and anxiety with art. I am so excited. A dream come true. I thought of a concept and just asked...and the HMO accepted it. The power of just asking for what you want!! The chemo sickness that has been with me since the infusion has not been fun. I am trying to focus on the good news...think positive but have to admit on days it is hard. I know the tumors are shrinking I just wish that I didn't feel like road kill afterwards. Sleepless nights filled with pain....pain of tumors shrinking and bowels that are blocked. I have to take the good with the bad and be greatful.
Yesterday I recieved a letter from the Social Security. My claim maybe approved. I don't want to hope but as I read the letter it is only a paper trail thing that needs to be verified that I have enough work credits. This will be a huge burden lifted and anxiety gone. Maybe just maybe things will be getting better.....keeping fingers crossed....keeping hope alive......waiting for the sickness to pass.