Life Insurance

I have a friend who writes several blogs for a living. This is like a dream come true for me since I have been blogging for years. A personal diary saved in cyberspace to pour out my feelings, fears, and joys. On one of her blogs she has annouced a contest about what you know about life insurance. Life insurance is something that I have always wanted and do not have.

Years ago I graduated from college and got married. I started out a career and started amasing all the things I thought I needed to be an adult. I got the cars, the clothes and the house. My work offerred a life insurance but I was young and healthy and thought I had plenty of time to buy life insurance. In my mind, I was invincable. Sickness had never entered my life, so buying insurance was something I wanted, but it was not a priority. I would buy it tomorrow was my motto. Tommorrow never came.

I read Angela's blog daily. Each morning, I get my coffee, and I search facebook for her several blogs. It is like reading the paper, but getting her view on life. It has also become something of a temptation of something I will never have. One of the blogs is Wholesale Insurance. I have relearned more about insurance and I resent the fact that I can not get insurance. It is like holding out a chocolate bar just out of arms reach to a chocoholic.

When I was young I had different priorities. I knew I needed life insurance but I also wanted to go on vacations, shop and get all the trapping that life had to offer. My parents had life insuance and I knew how much it helped when my dad passed away that my mother recieved all the benefits because they had planned and made life insurance a priority.

I was happy in my life when illness came to live with me like an unwanted houseguest. I was diagnosed with SLE Lupus, an auto immune disease. When first diagnosed not much was known about the disease and it was like getting a death sentence. Now everytime the question was asked "Do you have a serious disease?" on a questionaire I had to say yes and I could not get life insurance. I thought I would make up for not having life insurance by saving, but that did not take into account that I would later get cancer in 2004 and seperate from my husband.

Now daily, Angela's blog taunts me for having the I will do it tomorrow attidude. I don't qualify for life insurance and now that I have a grandchild, I will not be able to leave something for her or my daughters. It really is self torture that I read the benefits of having life insurance, yet it is something that always will be a carrot in front of my nose that will never happen.

My life's lesson is not to wait until tomorrow to do the things that are important, because you never know when your chance will be taken away. The chocolate bar is encased in an unbreakable glass case, and I do not have the key to open it.